Note to Self...


I'm stressed out. Everything that can go wrong, has gone wrong, and like Murphy's law, well, things are a mess. There's a mess in my head of things that I know can make happen, but they're not manifesting themselves very easily. 

In true sense of trying to make things work, I even went so far as to feng shui my bedroom. It worked for a couple of weeks- me believing that things were lovely. That things were looking up. That everything was going fine... and then the plague hit. Like dominos, my life is slowing falling down until I have nothing left but to remind myself, but that even two steps forward and one step back still equals one step forward. And that's enough. 

Reflections of myself aren't always the best, but I try. Oh, how I try to make things better than they need to be, even when they don't need to be better. Sometimes things don't make sense in my head, but if something isn't broken, why try to fix it? Stay satisfied, stay happy. 

Ps. My car is in the shop getting a new clutch and my master's project is behind on the progress charts. Call me dramatic. I need a reminder that things are not all bad. Being broke, stranded, and stressed is not all that it's cracked up to be.

Drama queen central right now.


Jane Droll said...

dude! no fun! i wish i could do something to help!!! i know things could be worse, but it is hard not to think things could be better too! :) they will get better, and hopefully SOON! very soon!!!

and thank you SO MUCH for your stepparenting comment. i read it 4 times. NO FUCKING FUN. NOT EASY. NO family is easy, but having multiple sets of parents -- none of which you have chosen or can control -- sounds awfully difficult. i was so naive to date someone with kids and not think these things might be an issue someday. ay yi yi. not easy stuff, and thank you for telling me your perspective!